Quarantine, Day 5
Okay, so it's 4:24 am on Wednesday, March 25, 2020.
I started showing symptoms of COVID-19 on Friday, March 19 (haha).
I haven't left my apartment since then.
While I have had the fever, body aches, lack of smell & taste, sore throat, abnormal cough, and very intense headache, these symptoms haven't been especially severe. Distinct, uncomfortable, and disquieting, to be sure.
But I've had much worse from sinus infections and even croup (yes, croup, which no one is supposed to get in the 21st century).
But staying home instead of going among people while being A Petri Dish Of Doom seems a safe bet.
My fever broke sometime yesterday, I think. So I think I'll be clear enough of symptoms and within a reasonable timeframe to go back to work.
If I hadn't just gotten my tax refund, being away from work for a week would be the most intense nightmare I can imagine (well, that and if I got pregnant).
My lease is up at the end of April.
My search for a new place has been understandably thwarted a bit by, ya know, the fact that a few weeks ago we all woke up in fucking 28 Days Later.
It's a goddamn global pandemic.
You know what they closed yesterday? INDIA.
A country with 1.3 BILLION citizens is now closed for the next three weeks.
I asked my apartment complex if I could have some sort of 4-week emergency extension on my lease, and they said no.
I don't think they can legally kick me out of my place during the global emergency, but I feel so intensely confused and overwhelmed by the whole thing.
I'm locked in my apartment. I am in a time and place where staying home, never leaving, and avoiding humans is WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO DO.
I should be in Heather Hermit Heaven.
But every moment, I feel like I should be doing something productive - I need to deep clean, and pack, and sort things.
I should be trying to call around and find a new place to live.
I am bad at this kind of shit - I am so confused and overwhelmed by bureaucracy. I get scared of protocols and things which require precision lest they bite one's ass.
But I am so friggin' tired. That's how this thing is really hitting me.
I haven't bothered trying to get tested. From all my snooping around and researching, it seems people with symptoms more intense than mine are ones who are being tested; or people with known exposure to a positive person. I do not know with certainty that I was around anyone who was exposed, but as I interact with the general public so regularly in my work, it seems reasonable that I was exposed at some point. Someone may have been an asymptomatic carrier who didn't know, hell - could've been someone who left self-quarantine to get some cigarettes and didn't tell me. *shrug*
I feel that, in the coming weeks and months, having a proof that I am (or was) definitely positive would be useful.
But I also feel like my chances of getting tested are about 40/60, and there is also a good chance that my symptoms are mild enough that I would be told to go home, stay put, rest, and hydrate. Which I'm doing (in between panic attacks).
Everything feels nebulous and uncertain.
No one knows what will happen next, but I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that I'm certain shit is gonna get worse before it gets better.
This is gonna be it: a weird stasis, watching and waiting, for weeks and months and months, and no one knows what will happen next.
I've been dreaming about the apocalypse since I was seven. (I was raised by nutjob fundamentalists).
In Alan Moore's Promethea, the main character is prophesied to end the world; when all is said and done, she enables an indelible leap forward in universal human consciousness and understanding of the nature of reality itself. The end of the world isn't literal, it's a sudden and dramatic shift in understanding.
Do I think the world is about to end? Not really. Do I think a bunch of people are gonna die?
Yes.
Do I think this is gonna impact everything everywhere for everyone? Yeah, I kinda do.
Meanwhile, I work at a gas station. Even amidst lockdown, we stay open. Once I finish my quarantine, I will be able to work. Earn money.
Because I love few things quite so much as a playlist, I've been crafting one for these strange times.
Ladies, gentlemen, and everybody else, please enjoy Heather's Quasi-Apocalypse Playlist!
Heather's Quasi-Apocalypse Playlist! #
I started showing symptoms of COVID-19 on Friday, March 19 (haha).
I haven't left my apartment since then.
While I have had the fever, body aches, lack of smell & taste, sore throat, abnormal cough, and very intense headache, these symptoms haven't been especially severe. Distinct, uncomfortable, and disquieting, to be sure.
But I've had much worse from sinus infections and even croup (yes, croup, which no one is supposed to get in the 21st century).
But staying home instead of going among people while being A Petri Dish Of Doom seems a safe bet.
My fever broke sometime yesterday, I think. So I think I'll be clear enough of symptoms and within a reasonable timeframe to go back to work.
If I hadn't just gotten my tax refund, being away from work for a week would be the most intense nightmare I can imagine (well, that and if I got pregnant).
My lease is up at the end of April.
My search for a new place has been understandably thwarted a bit by, ya know, the fact that a few weeks ago we all woke up in fucking 28 Days Later.
It's a goddamn global pandemic.
You know what they closed yesterday? INDIA.
A country with 1.3 BILLION citizens is now closed for the next three weeks.
I asked my apartment complex if I could have some sort of 4-week emergency extension on my lease, and they said no.
I don't think they can legally kick me out of my place during the global emergency, but I feel so intensely confused and overwhelmed by the whole thing.
I'm locked in my apartment. I am in a time and place where staying home, never leaving, and avoiding humans is WHAT I AM SUPPOSED TO DO.
I should be in Heather Hermit Heaven.
But every moment, I feel like I should be doing something productive - I need to deep clean, and pack, and sort things.
I should be trying to call around and find a new place to live.
I am bad at this kind of shit - I am so confused and overwhelmed by bureaucracy. I get scared of protocols and things which require precision lest they bite one's ass.
But I am so friggin' tired. That's how this thing is really hitting me.
I haven't bothered trying to get tested. From all my snooping around and researching, it seems people with symptoms more intense than mine are ones who are being tested; or people with known exposure to a positive person. I do not know with certainty that I was around anyone who was exposed, but as I interact with the general public so regularly in my work, it seems reasonable that I was exposed at some point. Someone may have been an asymptomatic carrier who didn't know, hell - could've been someone who left self-quarantine to get some cigarettes and didn't tell me. *shrug*
I feel that, in the coming weeks and months, having a proof that I am (or was) definitely positive would be useful.
But I also feel like my chances of getting tested are about 40/60, and there is also a good chance that my symptoms are mild enough that I would be told to go home, stay put, rest, and hydrate. Which I'm doing (in between panic attacks).
Everything feels nebulous and uncertain.
No one knows what will happen next, but I think I speak for a lot of people when I say that I'm certain shit is gonna get worse before it gets better.
This is gonna be it: a weird stasis, watching and waiting, for weeks and months and months, and no one knows what will happen next.
I've been dreaming about the apocalypse since I was seven. (I was raised by nutjob fundamentalists).
In Alan Moore's Promethea, the main character is prophesied to end the world; when all is said and done, she enables an indelible leap forward in universal human consciousness and understanding of the nature of reality itself. The end of the world isn't literal, it's a sudden and dramatic shift in understanding.
Do I think the world is about to end? Not really. Do I think a bunch of people are gonna die?
Yes.
Do I think this is gonna impact everything everywhere for everyone? Yeah, I kinda do.
Meanwhile, I work at a gas station. Even amidst lockdown, we stay open. Once I finish my quarantine, I will be able to work. Earn money.
Because I love few things quite so much as a playlist, I've been crafting one for these strange times.
Ladies, gentlemen, and everybody else, please enjoy Heather's Quasi-Apocalypse Playlist!
Heather's Quasi-Apocalypse Playlist! #
Comments
Post a Comment